


Mermista's Wild Ride

by MinaAffairs



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Comedy, F/F, F/M, Multi, Nonsense, crack ships, written in discord
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-13
Updated: 2019-10-13
Packaged: 2020-12-14 06:21:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21011177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MinaAffairs/pseuds/MinaAffairs
Summary: Mermista develops a crush on Lord Hordak which quickly spirals out of control.Complete silly crackship fic, written for fun in Discord.





	Mermista's Wild Ride

**Author's Note:**

> Each 'section' was written based on real time response to the previous section in Discord. This is crackship comedy.

The Hordak like creature was baring down on Mermista fast. Entirely too fast. She had also made the mistake of not noticing it over the other soldiers she was fighting. A rather large mistake. For a brief moment Mermista really thought she was going to finally bite it. Fear fills her in her final moments, real deep fear.

As the thing reared up its weapon, sneering at her, the Princess of Salineas finds an arm warp around her waste. With a yelp she’s tugged to the side, and a large energy cannon attached to an armor encased arm is extended out. It hums with power for a moment, power that is suddenly unleashed.

The brutes arm is gone in a flash. Then there’s another flash and the top half of its body is gone, simply erased from existence. The remains fall over lifeless.

Lord Hordak releases Mermista, she stumbles, wide eyed and staring up at the alien conquerer in shock and something else.

He looks serious, focusing on the battlefield as he releases the built up heat from his arm cannon. The flames of destruction that he himself has born during this engagement flicker in the backdrop to highlight him. Like a stoic god of war in an oil painting. “Are you alright?” He asks as he glances down at Mermista.

“Uh… Yeah… I’m good.” Mermista feels a burning sensation crawl up her cheeks.

“Good. Pay more attention to your sorroundings moving forward.” Hordak adds as he readies his weapon and fires on another target, returning to the fray proper as if this entire moment did not happen.

…

“Princess Mermista. You seem distracted.” The voice jolts Mermista out of her daydreaming. Hordak is standing before her, quirking a brow at her surprise. When had he approached her? She had been watching him how could he have approached her without her noticing?!

Watching him for entirely Alliance related reasons of course.

“Oh. Yeah sorry. I’ve just been… Thinking about stuff.” The princess tries to brush it off casually. He does not need to know anything about these nonsense feelings swirling inside of her mind.

Hordak nods, seeming to ponder that response before looking out from their campsite to the fields below. Visibly charred and broken from the battle earlier, even in the moonlight. “Indeed. There is much to think about. It seems we have Prime’s forces on the run… For now. The use of heavy weaponry has closed the bottleneck of his armies entry.”

“Yeah…”

“Still. If you cannot remain focused you should get rest while things are calm.” Hordak notes, nodding to Mermista. “I can keep watch of this post while you do so, so do not worry.”

Again heat flushes Mermistas cheeks. Why? He’s just being a fellow soldier. Collected and calculating and thoughtful…

“Thanks. I think I will.” Mermista tries to say casually. Taking a deep breath and heading to her sleeping roll. Best to sleep this off.

…

Burning cheeks? Easy to handle. A flutter in the chest when he brings her coffee in the mornings of their shared deployment? That can be pushed down. That slight pleasant burning in her core as he destroys the armies of their enemy? That’s a fluke.

This though. This… Ache in her chest… This Mermista can barely stand. It’s eating at her.

They’ve met back up with another group of Alliance soldiers. Specifically a group with Entrapta in it. It was immediate, the Princess of Dryl shouting “Hordak!” And literally leaping into his arms with a happy laugh.

And Hordak catching her.

The way they smile at each other. The way they nuzzle and give each other gentle loving kisses. The sheer… Apparentness of their love. The bottomless affection they seem to share. Even the way they immediately and seamlessly get to work together. As if they barely need to say anything to know each other’s thoughts.

It hurts. Mermista hurts.

It doesn’t help that Sea Hawk is here too. He’s nice and she is fond of him but he does not currently mix well with these very problematic feelings.

“Oh Mermiiiistaaaa! The greatest soldier there ever waaaaas!” Sea Hawk sings at her side.

She groans and glowers. Pulling her eyes away from the happy lab couple working on bots nearby. “Please stop…”

She isn’t sure who she’s talking to at this point.

…

“Oh I can share.” Entrapta says with a mischievous grin.

Mermista stammers. Actually stammers. How had it come to this? Sure she had been a tad surly and more flippant than usual but how had Entrapta of all people figured out what was going on? And why was Entrapta okay with it?! “yeah well… What about Hordak?”

Entrapta giggles. “Oh he’s fine with it too. Watch!” She glances back. “Hordak!”

The Lord looks up from his maintenance of Emily. “Hmm?”

“Would you want to sleep with Mermista sometimes?” Entrapta asks. “It would help her morale!”

Mermista is beat red. Entrapta is shouting right now. Alliance soldiers are staring. This is awful. All Mermista can do is wait for Hordak to tell Entrapta no. That Entrapta is being ridiculous as she tends to do.

However Hordak just nods. “Very well. It will likely increase her battlefield efficiency if she has been desiring that.”

Mermista gapes.

Some of the people listening in gape too.

…

“No!” Adora shouts. “No! No no no! No!”

Mermista is clutching her forehead. Beat red. Entrapta can be so loud and soldiers gossip and now everyone knows.

Everyone. Knows. The other Princesses, the entire army, probably Horde Prime himself.

“It’s already… Weird! That Entrapta and Hordak are a thing!” Adora adds on to her exclaiming.

“Pretty sure that’s rude!” Entrapta shoots back looking grumpy.

“It is.” Hordak assures his wife. He’s unbelievably calm.

Suddenly Sea Hawk let’s out another loud sob. He has been doing that. “Mermista! I thought we HAD SOMETHING!!!” His eyes are red, filled with tears.

Mermista wants to die. Just bury her at sea right now.

Catra raises her hand from the crate she’s sitting on. “To be fair to Mermista. Hordak IS hot.”

“Catra No!” Adora screams in horror.

“I will not be sleeping with Catra, even if it won the war.” Hordak notes mostly to Entrapta.

“Ouch.” Catra fires back sarcastically.

This is all the worst.

…

“So let me get this straight” Queen Glimmer of Bright Moon looks over the assembled Etherian Alliance Ruling Council. “You have all called a council meeting to discuss… A moratorium on sleeping with Hordak?…”

“Yes!” Adora stands and shouts. “It’s a distraction from the war effort!”

“This is ridiculous!” Entrapta shouts back. “It’s a morale boosting activity!”

“He’s evil Entrapta! It’s already weird you do it!”

Mermista is currently trying to slide under the table to hide. Anything to get away from this.

Perfuma raises her hand. “Excuse me… I have a question.”

Glimmer sighs. “Yes Perfuma?”

“Is the issue that Hordak is evil?…”

“Yes!” Adora shouts.

“That’s irrelevant!” Entrapta shouts back. “He’s just ethically divergent!”

Perfuma cuts through. “Um… Okay… So… If the issue is he’s evil… Can we still sleep with other evil people? Like Shadow Weaver?”

“WHAT?!” Catra and Adora both scream in unbridled horror.

Even Hordak looks over at Perfuma with wide eyes at that one. Mermista feels slightly better for a moment as the focus leaves her.

…

“Okay!” Adora shouts. She never stops shoutong. She’s gesturing to the large board covered in pictures and documents with string and other nonsense. They’ve been here for hours. “I think we have this worked out!”

Entrapta, standing next to Adora nods. “Yes! This seems fair!”

Everyone else is sitting back watching this unfold. Entrapta and Adora basically completely took over for this whole meeting. Mermista continues to look and feel like dying, Hordak looks quietly amused, Catra is glowering, Perfuma strangely hopeful.

Queen Glimmer just looks so tired.

Really everyone else is some mix of those and the air in the room is heavy and awkward.

“So!” Adora continues. “There will be no more casual sleeping with Hordak with the singular exception of Entrapta who due to sleeping with him previously and remaining effective is allowed to continue. However others may petition the alliance council for permission to sleep with Hordak if they can show good cause that it would somehow aid the war effort!”

Entrapta nods. “Hordak and I retain full rights to veto any yes given by the council in this regard though!” She adds.

“This is so stupid.” Catra mutters quietly.

“Furthermore!” Adora says loudly. “We should all be aware of the Shadow Weaver clause that states that Princess Perfuma, and only her, may sleep with Shadow Weaver under stipulation that she never ever talk about it again!”

“Yay” Perfuma claps.

…

As everyone leaves Hordak approaches Mermista. The Princess of Salineas looks up at him, feeling so… Everything. This crush spiralled out of control in ways she could scarcely comprehend and she just wanted to hide in Salineas forever.

“Hordak…” She mutters.

“Princess Mermista.” He replies, glancing around as people file out quickly. Trying to escape this horrible meeting.

Suddenly when they’re mostly alone the Lord leans forward, close to Mermista. She almost shivers. “Petty Alliance rulings aside. Feel free to visit Dryl as you desire.” He grins. Red teeth glinting in the light. “We are good at being discrete.” He adds before standing back up and marching away to rejoin Entrapta.

Mermista is beet red.

…

Mermista stares up at the ceiling of the royal chambers of Dryl. A room of metal and purple and fluffy furniture. She’s in the bed, a massive thing. How did she even get here? It’s all a blur. Not actually of course, she knows exactly how she got here, she followed through on the invitation. The emotional journey is what’s a blur.

All because Hordak saved her life. Honestly that’s kind of cliche and pathetic.

Before Mermista can let out a groan of defeat she feels a body press against get and glances over. Entrapta. Naked and curled against the Princess of Salineas. Snoring and cuddling. Mermista stares at her for a moment in… Bewilderment? This whole situation is so bizarre.

Then the person on her opposite side speaks. “Cute isn’t she?” Hordak asks with a pleased tone. “Do not worry about waking her, Entrapta sleeps like the dead.” He adds.

“Yeah…” Mermista nods absently before staring back up at the ceiling. “The alliance is going to kill me…”

“They don’t need to know.” Hordak adds. “Do you want breakfast? I can make something for you two.”

Mermista looks over at him. “Uh… Okay.” Might as well get free food if this is happening after all.


End file.
